Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

Why couldn't the little boy skate? He had cancer.

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

potatoes

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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