- Anti Joke

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff

We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

What does Santa get for Christmas? A shitload of work to do.

What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

whats pale and white your ass.