Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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World Peace

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

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a little girl gets raped

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

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Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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That's what he said.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

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uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

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2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops