Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

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What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

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A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

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This is a joke with a difference. It isn't funny.

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

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A horse walks into a bar. It neighs and knocks over a few tables before leaving the bar confused.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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you just lost the game!

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Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

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why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

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What do you get when an Alabama and an LSU kid are mixed?A small child who grows up in a world of fighting and domestic violence.

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what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

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Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

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roses are red violet are blu--- blue? violets are violet! weird, isn't it?

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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So i was walking down the street and this guy was really excited. I said "what is so Exciting?" He said "i just saw Justin bieber kiss a girl."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

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Small titties.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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