Homosexual babies? It's a choice

how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

come along children

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

69

Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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