a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

DONALD TRUMP DIES

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

Hey Patrick Yea? I found something funnier then 24 Give to me buddy 25

What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

Hey are you from Tennessee, 'cause you have a very nice accent.

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

Knock Knock. Shut up.

How many Chinese men people does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Anyone can screw in a light bulb, regardless of race or gender.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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