a rabbi sees a nazi in time square. he simply walks past because as we are in america the nazi can do nothing to harm him.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They gave here a timeout, like any other sensible parent would.

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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FOLLOW ME @airvvv

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

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What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

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Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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Penis in a box.

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there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

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What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

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Hey you want to hear a joke? Oh well. Goodbye

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When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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