What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

A polish, english and african man each were standing on a skyscraper. The african man jumped and died. The polish and enlgish men called 999.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

Lets go Detroit Pistons!

*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

come along children

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...