What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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Why does Justin Beiber's asswhole hurt, and his father's dick was brown? Because he ate mexican food and his on his dad's dick.

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What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

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I have read and agree to terms of service.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

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What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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Which one is hardest?

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

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why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

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A polish, english and african man each were standing on a skyscraper. The african man jumped and died. The polish and enlgish men called 999.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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