Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Kittens.

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What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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Pickle!

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-Why did Sara fall off the swing? -I don't know, why? -She had no arms, knock knock -Who's there? -Not Sara.

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

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Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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Why....... Because.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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Two juggalos go to an Insane Clown Posse show.

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I am funny, yes? No, you are not.

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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