A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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I'm not racist... Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

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*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

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What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

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Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

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What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

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Knock Knock Good one...

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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Your mom is so ugly that your father married her because of emotional, spiritual, and intellectual compatibility, not because of sexual attraction.

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Roses are red Voliets are blue I suck at making poems Refrigerator

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A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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chuck norris

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

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i like potatoes

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What's the differance between a pile of leaves and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a pile of leaves burning in my backyard.

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a boy comes to a girl and ask : do you like vaginas ? and she says course not your dumb ass and he says then give her to me *troll face*

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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