roses are white violets are green if you you sit on santas lap he will stab you

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

Q: why did sally fall off the swing A: she had no arms A:knock knock Q:who is there A:not sally

What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

Windows Vista

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

Potato potato potato potato potato? Potato potato potato.

arse

roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

Your mom is so ugly that your father married her because of emotional, spiritual, and intellectual compatibility, not because of sexual attraction.

Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...