my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Black people

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If life hands you lemons Take them

thumb_up thumb_down +13

ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

thumb_up thumb_down +13

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

thumb_up thumb_down +9

husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I'm not racist... Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So there's this cup that I own... I use it to aid in the drinking of my hot or cold beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops