why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you know what time it is? Because I don't wanna be late for class and if you told the time, it will surely help me because I'll be able to arrive early at my class not to mention it would greatly improve my punctuality efforts to help me pass the class this semester. Geez, I remember back in middle school there was a guy name Billy Jones and he used to always be late for class. His name was Billy but we called him Bill. Bill was his nickname but his real name was Billy. Anyways, he was always late for class because he would always make the best barbecue ribs in town.... (45 minutes later...) ....and I told Bill, "Man, if you were to just ask what time it was it would greatly help you in arriving to class early." And he was was like "I know but..."And then I cut him off and I said "But nothing. I don't care what kind of barbecue ribs you make, you just can't do that." So there I was, me and him, sitting down and .... (3 hours later...) ...it was awesome. Boy, I remember back in the early 90's when I was at elementary school, it was a stormy weather and we had to go to class. That's when I met Clarissa. She was a really nice girl and I remember there was a time when... (to be continued....)

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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What did the man say after he was shot? Nothing, because the bullet hit the man with so much impact that he instantly died and was unable to talk at the current time. Others in the surrounding area walked by as if nothing was there.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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An American, an Indian and an African walked into a bar. They had a memorable time together.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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