Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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Brians mother always told him to reach for the stars. He died the next morning.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should i know, i do not speak chicken.

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

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What do you get if you put a lepper in front of a fan A mess

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

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Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

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What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

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1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops