- Anti Joke

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" BOOOOOOM" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenburg? A: One is a huge, flaming, Nazi gasbag, and the other is a drug-addicted talkshow host.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

bite me

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

Ross.

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

i'm an inbred jew - Barras

Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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