Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops