A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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