How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How ma......

Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

Why is Sophie incapable of Lifeguarding correctly? Because she only has limited use of all of her senses , especially hearing,

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

Yo' momma so fat she buys clothingthat is bigger than most other people's clothing

As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

How do you mess with Hellen Keller? Re-arrange her furniture.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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