What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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