What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

Knock Knock.

hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

Weaner

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

A man is sitting on his couch. The lights go out and his TV begins to float away. He breaks down into tears believing he has been cursed for a crime he commited earlier.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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