Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

every knight i see an owl at window

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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