Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

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Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Why did little Susie Fall in the well? She had downs.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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