Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what looks like a banana? a penis

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

thumb_up thumb_down -31

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red Violets are blue Urine is yellowish and shit is usually brown... That's it, I was just remembering the colors of some stuffs

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

thumb_up thumb_down +8

if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops