Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...