What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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did you hear about the circus fire? it was tragic and hundreds of people were killed.

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(PC) Why aren't regular jokes as good as anti-jokes? Because they are worse than anti-jokes.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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Why did the priest take a little boy into the back room? To talk about the boy's future.

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

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why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't he got ran over half way.

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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