What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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A gay man watches football.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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