What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

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Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

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Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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