Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

Roses are red, Violets are violet.

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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