Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

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When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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Youre in your car, and you stop at a light you see a home less person holding a sign that says "Home less and hungry, anything helps." You ask if they want a box of cereal, "No thanks." They replied, you ask why not? "Well, I really just want to go to the movies."

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A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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What do you call an asian who celebrates Christmas? A christan

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Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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Why did the fat Jew cross the road? To go to the bicycle shop to fix his puncture

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What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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