Here's a joke for you, my life...

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

Why did the man cross the road? To get to the homeless shelter.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. I'm not sure, because there are many farmers on this earth, and finding the same one that you are talking about, may be hard. It may take a while, but i'll get back to you as soon as possible, with an anwser.

Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

Dick Cheney That's the joke

Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a creepy movie, and it gave Six nightmares.

why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

What did the dad say when the irresponsible goth problem child asked for a gun Yes

1: What do you call your car door when it's opened slightly? 2: I don't know. What? 1: Ajar! 2: A jar? 1: No. Ajar. 2: But it's a door. 1: Just forget it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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