Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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i found waldo.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he got hit by a car. Follow forever.art7 on Insta.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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