How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

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There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

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Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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did u ever hear a bird joke "no" hawkword

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops