Cripples are lame.

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

What do anti-jokes and a can of corn have in common? Both can be stored indefinitely and accessed and enjoyed at will.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? Nothing. He won't get them for the rest of his life.

Who is big and stupid My brother

In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

Suck pussy

What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...