How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

john liked the paper........ so he took it

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

What did the black college graduate say to the Jewish high school dropout? Do you want me to also clean your fourth floor executive bathroom, Mr. Bernstein?

If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

a chicken walks into terry's house he penetrates himn

A Mexican, a Caucasian, and an African-American jump out of an airplane. They all die.

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

If you throw a violist and a soprano off a cliff, which one would hit the ground first? Who cares?

I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I peek in your window, Yes, I'm watching you

Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

your no better than a cockroach

What do you call it? Whatever it is.

What's grey and can't climb trees? A parking lot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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