What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

Andoni was here

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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