hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops