Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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I know a black person. His name is Mikey.

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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