Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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