How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

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Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Jimmy Saville

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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