Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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How did the black man get into college? A mop.

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Want to here a joke? Me to...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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