Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

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who is an indian that can not shoot a bow and arrow? David

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 encountered 7 in the Vietnam War where he killed 6's brothers, leaving him scarred. 6 has countless nightmares due to the numerous visions that reminisce that situation in great deal. Also, 7 had a big hook on his hand, which was very scary.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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