A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +8

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops