What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

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Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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no rasist joks

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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