In soviet Russia...things are different

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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A gay man watches football.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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