One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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