Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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What's the difference between a duck? Both legs are of equal length, especially the right.

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Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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