What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

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What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops