How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How you know when dislextic

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -19

EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

thumb_up thumb_down -21

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

thumb_up thumb_down -21

They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops