What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops