Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

thumb_up thumb_down +17

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops