Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

like this or you will die at some point in your life

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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