Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

What are kids supposed to do in American classrooms if a nuke hits nearby? Hide under the desk. (This is a fact) Moral: Like that is gonna help... seriously that is ridiculous!

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

Roses are red, yup.

What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, we're taking your house. This is a vacation notice, please be out of the property in 30 days. Have a nice day.

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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