A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

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Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

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Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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Whats green? Mountain Dew.

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What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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