Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

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Pickle

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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8

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Gustavo Andrade

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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wnna here a joke, toby limbers playing basketball

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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Jesus Christ

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Q. What did the Vampire say when he ate the Pizza? A. Nothing. It is literally impossible for a vampire to be real, therefore it's insane if you thought it said something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops