What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

What's better than a stick? A stone

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

woman's rights

you will like this because i am black.

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

a dyslexic man walked his god.

Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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