how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

Tilt your screen back .

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? you wave.

23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

What's the difference between celery and a truck?

Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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