Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

civil rights

Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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