Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

thumb_up thumb_down +12

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops