How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Ask me if I'm a tree? Are you a tree? No.

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

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Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops