Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practise.

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What happened when the paraplegic man went into the bar? Nothing the man couldnt get into the bar because the bar has no wheelchair ramp.

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A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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