Two guys walk into a bar. They have drinks, pay for them, then get into a car crash killing a mom and her daughter returning home from selecting a wedding dress. The wedding is canceled. Rate This Comment 0

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

A man has a meeting with his doctor and his doctor says "I have some bad news, you have cancer and you have alzheimer's," to which the man replies... "Well at least I don't have cancer." This is an example of a fallacy claim.

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

Boner

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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MOAR??

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