A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

hello

What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...