How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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