Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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