A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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