What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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Why was the black kid in the AP Calculus classroom? Because he was a very driven student, who studied hard so that he could attend a good University and build a good life for himself and his family.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

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What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

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What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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