Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

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What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

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What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

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A man was wacking it and then his internet went down he then cut off his own balls then his internet came back

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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