What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Fear in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He said to himself, there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's Magical Basement. Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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What colour is a black man in a freezer black

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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