i have aids and a chode

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Global Warming.

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A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.

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What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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knock knock go away

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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Why was Billy sad? An evil clown hit him with an Axe.

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What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

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What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

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knock knock come in

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

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If TACOS are Mexican PASTA is Italian HAMBURGER is American Then what is pizza???..... Dough, Cheese and Sauce Just Kidding, that was bad..... Turtles..... :D

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potato

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Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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