"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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No soup for you!

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c======3

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

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Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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the WNBA.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops