A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

want more?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock The guy opens the door

thumb_up thumb_down -17

One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how many black people can you fit in a car? However many sets there are.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops