A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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A jew was walking down the street what did he see? the holocaust

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Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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How do you make a small child cry? You cut off his fingers..

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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