What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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What did the amputee get for Christmas? Shot.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

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How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? This is a psychological question which the egg came from the chicken, but the chicken also came from an egg, so the world may never know exactly.

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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What happens to a banana after it gets sunburnt? It peels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops