Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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son, you're adopted.

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What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

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I hate you.

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

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What has 4 eyes, but can't see? 2 blind people.

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62

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Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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The government makes a good decision

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Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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A black guy walks in to a bar.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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