What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

Burp

What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

Donald Trump decided to run for President.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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