What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

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AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

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what do jews, blacks, and asians have in common? they have all been targets of racism!

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Your mamma's such a whore, she sleeps with men who pay her.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis

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The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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No soap radio

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

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Whats funnier than 24, 69

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

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Latvia isn't a joke

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So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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