How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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What's black and yellow and flies? I dont know.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

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Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

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Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops