So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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I hate you.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

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three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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