there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

Iceland is actually green and Greenland is actually icy and Germany started the Holocaust.

human centipede

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

Wanna hear a joke? What? Life.

A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...