What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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What do you call an Ex-Penn State coach who is anal to young boys? - Strict

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

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What's the worst thing about that Black Jew at the Bus Stop? He's taking a bus to go to his mother's funeral.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops